Finding a way to share parenting time while living separately is usually a challenge. The need to share parental authority is also difficult but does not receive nearly as much attention as the division of parenting time.
Parents need to see each other regularly to exchange custody, but they may need to remain in closer contact than simply acknowledging one another from a distance during custody exchanges. The responsibility to share legal authority and decision-making power for children requires that parents interact with one another regularly and understand their rights.
What challenges do parents usually face when they share authority for their minor children?
The need to communicate
Both parents generally have the right to access information about their children’s health and education. They need to inform one another when there have been any significant changes regarding the children. Doing so in writing, possibly through a parenting app, helps validate claims that parents have proactively fulfilled their responsibility to keep one another informed about major matters regarding their shared children. Parents generally need to understand relevant information to settle disagreements about where their children attend school, when they can participate in sports and what medical care is necessary for their well-being.
The authority to act
Both parents generally have control over what happens during their time with the children. For example, if a child comes down with the flu during your weekend with one parent, that parent chooses how to treat their flu and what medical facility they visit for care. Parents should relate any significant decisions that they make during their parenting time to one another. They generally should not attempt to micromanage one another’s parenting decisions.
The need to agree, sometimes
When parents share legal authority, they must agree on major decisions. If one parent proposes moving the children to a different school, they have to discuss that matter, as the approval of both parents is likely necessary. The same is true for non-emergency medical interventions with long-term implications. Parents may have to discuss their plans and ensure that they both agree on what is best for their children. In scenarios where a major decision causes protracted conflicts and parents cannot reach an agreement, it may sometimes be necessary to request the intervention of a family law judge.
Sharing parental authority can be as challenging as sharing parenting time. People who recognize the potential for conflict can establish more effective initial custody arrangements and navigate the complexities of co-parenting more effectively as a result.